In so many ways, I deny myself the right to make things about me. Why? For some reason, we think that when we make it about ourselves, we’re selfish. What if everything I do is about me? Even though I’m doing it for someone else.
We say in coaching that you’ll attract clients that are going through similar experiences to your past experiences or to what you’re currently going through. On some level, these clients resonate with you (as coach) and, there is something for you – Me – to learn from them. In helping them, I ultimately help myself, so then it is about me. What a paradox.
In the teachings of Yogi Bhajan, the first sutra of the Five Sutras of the Aquarian Age is ‘Recognize the other person is you.’
“We can only truly see ourselves reflected in another person. If we admire qualities in another, those same qualities exist within ourselves. These qualities may not yet be developed or expressed. On the flip side, if we see qualities that we dislike in another, again, we only see ourselves. Perhaps a disowned part called “the shadow.” The more we identify with our ego, the more judgmental we will be toward others, and the more we will project our personality traits onto others.
In the Age of Aquarius, the age of enlightenment, we are being called, to take full responsibility for our experiences and to live the Truth, which is we are ALL ONE.”
I think this is a beautiful perspective to have. I’ve recently been pondering on the parallel between my clients and myself. What do I see as a reflection?
I found this an interesting exercise to do. I saw enlightening truths about where I don’t honor myself, where I don’t back myself, where I am leaving gaps and lacking commitment to myself. The reality of this isn’t always easy to face. However, the beauty lies in seeing it, becoming aware of it, so that now I can integrate and grow from it.
All interactions are an opportunity to learn and grow. When we have this awareness, we enter a whole new ball game. What it requires of us is to take a step back and observe – observe yourself, observe the other.
What do you see?
What do you like?
What don’t you like?
What are you avoiding?
You can find answers to important questions when you take this time and heighten your awareness.
To conclude, when I THINK it is not about me, it IS actually about me. And, when I can reflect on it this way, I can position myself as a conscious choice-maker which ultimately is the deciding factor in how I experience life.
Wrapping it up here leads me into one of my favorite topics – RESPONSIBILITY – which I am going to leave for my next piece. For now, embrace making it about you!